Interview: Steph Paul

Our fifth interview is with choreographer and maker Steph Paul. I don’t quite remember meeting Steph which probably means we met on a dance floor and instantly became friends. She is one of the hardest working creatives in the city. Steph will be choreographing for multiple shows and will still not miss watching a Serena Williams tennis match. I was curious about how Steph was using her time and what she was thinking about over the last year and a half. How does a person who was moving non-stop and suddenly forced to stop handle that? Does one pivot and keep going or do they actually take the time to rest and reflect?

-- Alyssa Gregory

Alyssa Gregory: What has been keeping you sustained throughout this whole time? Mentally, emotionally, and creatively.

Steph Paul: Hmm. That’s a moment by moment, or second by second, sort of feeling. I really feel in terms of mental sustainment, creative sustainment, emotional sustainment, I definitely think within the past year, they've all been in a blender. You know what I mean? There's no way to compartmentalize because I feel like I am living in high definition, aggressive color at all times. Everything is happening all at once. And so, I think for me, something that has really helped me has been being conscious of how I can be a partner to myself. How can I wake up every day and check in with myself: What's good today? We made it. Here we go. What do we speak? What do we want? How are we feeling inside? You know what I mean? How's the body feeling checking in with my hips. You good? You need some love? Let me check in with you.

And I think not being able to be in close proximity with people for so long has forced me to really connect with the one person I'm in close proximity with all the time, which is myself. And so, what has sustained me has just been that, that check-in, you know, and, and being open to that check-in honestly every, every moment if I need it.

Alyssa: I have to keep telling myself there is some good in this. There is a lot of sadness, there's a lot of loss, and there's a lot of grief, but there is good that artists now know, oh shit, I have to rest.

I was listening to Po’ Chop on the Pivot Arts Podcast and she talked about how she doesn’t miss the all-day hustle. I don't miss leaving my house at 9:00 a.m. with all the clothes and all the food you need to survive your entire day and then coming back at home at 10:00 p.m. and going to bed and getting up and doing it again.

Steph: I'm sure every artist has had the experience of eating lunch in the car and crying. Yeah, that can remain in the past.

Alyssa: Tell me what was the last creative thing that you did before the panini press hit?

Steph: Prior to pandemic….so I work a ton in theater. Both choreography and direction.

And pretty much at the same time I was working on a play called Where the Mountain Meets the Sea at Actors Theater of Louisville for the Humana Festival which is an annual festival. It’s a festival that I love, and I got the opportunity to work on this play in which the two main characters were Haitian.

It was a Haitian immigrant father and his son who is Haitian-American. Those were the two main actors.

For me, it was so profound because I'm Haitian and I got to work on a play where I see my father on the stage, I see my mother on stage. It was such an important opportunity for me to just to be in conversation with my own story.

Anyhow, the play closed on opening night, basically because of the pandemic. I will never forget walking into the theater and the actors and the team were in a circle holding hands.

And I was showing up to see the show and I'm like, what's going on? And they're just all sobbing and I'm still just like, what's going on? And then they realized, I didn't know the show is canceled. My brain's like, okay, is it happening tomorrow? The dots were not connecting because it all happened so fast.

Literally it felt like, Tom Hanks got COVID, the NBA shut down, and then the world ended, that's literally what it felt like happened. So I joined them in this circle and they're like, the show's canceled. I'm like, okay. And then they're like, no, the show is canceled and the festival is canceled.

And then I was like, oh wow, this is not a game. That was a really hard loss because as a woman of color, as a child of immigrants, first generation American, to be so close to getting to share this story, that meant so much to me. And I just knew it was going to mean so much to others. I don't want this to be the casualty and I assume so many artists have their version of this experience that I had. I know I'm not in this isolated chamber of sorrow, but that was really, really hard to like, basically be an inch from the finish line and to be like, nah, I can't pass go directly on Monopoly.

And at the same time, I was also working on a show in Chicago. We don't need to need to get into the technicalities of how I was working on both shows at the same time.

Alyssa: Hahaha. I was like, I know geography, how did Steph do this?

Steph: The directors of the plays were superheroes and quite kind and made it work, so that I could split my time. These are things that I attempted to do in pre-pandemic life, right? Have all of the plates spinning at once. Something that maybe I will seek to not do anymore. But I was also working on a show called The Last Match by Anna Ziegler at Writers Theater.

We were also supposed to open just right before the pandemic. I was movement directing Where the Mountain Meets the Sea and I was choreographing The Last Match and, you know, it was just one heartbreak after another.

And The Last Match for me was so meaningful because it’s a show about tennis and I love tennis. I’m Serena Williams’ number one fan.

Alyssa: I know that about you.
Do you feel like your work has changed or has any part of it gotten stronger?

Steph: I think there were earlier versions of myself that thought my work was my anchor. I was just trying to make stuff and make money. And, let me be clear, there's nothing wrong with making money — we got bills to pay and I'm still trying to make money. But I think I was letting the wind blow me a little bit. Who thinks I'm cool? Who thinks I'm hot? Who's going to hire me? When am I going to, you know, reach this pinnacle in my career? When am I going to do that thing? And now, maybe it's just because of this pandemic has been for so many of us the great equalizer. Cause none of us are doing anything now. And so, I think in terms of what shifted for me is I'm just being a little bit more strategic and more thoughtful about what do I actually want to do. Who do I actually want to work with? What sort of projects do I really want to open up my heart to? Because this stuff is so tied. I mean, we're in the business, both in dance and in theater, of opening up hearts and like really delving into humanity.

Alyssa: What do you want your first art experience to be when the outside opens back up?

Steph: Okay. So I could approach that question from like, what's the art experience that I seek as a creator, but I can't help but think about what's the experience I can see just as a human being and honestly, it's not even in a show. I want to be in a space. With human beings with live music and dancing.

I want my body to be in conversation with other people's bodies. You know, when that song comes on and you make eye contact with somebody, you're feeling yourself and you're feeling each other, the room's alive, you know. I think that's what I seek. Yeah, I seek just like the exchange of energy and emotion and a sweaty hug. Just like, give me a good old, sweaty hug. We are alive.

Alyssa: Yes!!

Steph: And I know that's just kind of like a night out, you know, but for me right now, that’s where we're at. That feels like the most beautifully profound, artistic experience of we are here, we are alive, we made it and we are still going.

That's what I want.

Steph Paul is a director/choreographer who clears space for uninhibited physical truth. What comes up must come out. She weaves together her lived experience as a first-generation Haitian-American, body percussionist, dancer, athlete, and is passionate about art as a means to build a team. Credits include: The Last Match (Writers Theatre), How to Defend Yourself (Victory Gardens Theater, Humana Festival), Where the Mountain Meets the Sea (Humana Festival), The Wolves (Studio Theatre - Helen Hayes Award, Outstanding Choreography in a Play), Learning Curve (Albany Park Theater Project, Third Rail Projects). Next, she will be directing and choreographing The Royale (Kansas City Repertory Theatre) and co-directing How to Defend Yourself (New York Theatre Workshop). Steph is an Artistic Associate of Chicago Dance Crash, a proud member of Stage Directors and Choreographers Society, and a 2021 Princess Grace Award-winner. She's also Serena Williams' biggest fan and in awe of improbable comebacks. www.stephpaul.com